Movie Review: Black Swan

Black Swan - The Tactical Movie

This is a first for us. Movie reviews. But since a movie called Black Swan just had to be about something tactical or military, I agreed with ‘her’ that we would rent it and post a review.

When ‘she’ said she wanted to watch Black Swan, I was like, awesome! A movie about the Crni Labudovi? 800 brave Bosnian Special Forces soldiers. Reputation for battlefield bravery. Led by “Kapetan Labud” or Captain Swan “en anglais.” How awesome is my wife, wanting to watch a movie about the special forces unit in the Army of the Republic of Bosnia and Herzegovina? Eat my dust other guys out there. You wish you were me. Admit it – it sucks to be you.
	Yeah honey, that’s ‘more or less‘ what its about, so let’s watch it tonight.  (Ha! He’s so gullible.) You know, I haven’t seen it yet, but I’m not so sure it’s about the Crni Labudovi. It could be. Ummm, perhaps…
No problem. Got it. I always wanted to know the story of the HMS Black Swan and it’s role in defending Norway in WWII. I’m part Norwegian you know.
	Sure. Just watch and let it be a surprise! Doesn’t that sound fun?  I’m not positive, but I don’t remember too much about ships in the previews…
Well, it absolutely must be about Team BlackSwan E-TAC (Elite Tactical Assault Company) which, as everyone already knows, is a high-performance paintball team based out of Oshkosh, Wisconsin. It is about them right? Right?
	Remember, movies are always better when the plot’s a surprise!
That wasn’t quite what I expected.
	The dance choreography beautifully complemented Natalie Portman’s stellar performance. The psychological intrigue and constantly twisting plot were fully realized in a redemptively tragic ending. I was moved. A well deserved Oscar for Natalie!
Puke.  Honey I’ve got a great chick-flick for our next movie night. It’s called Full Metal Jacket. I think it’s about the newest fashion rage on the Parris runways (and obstacle courses…)
	Ummm. I’m not falling for that. Nice try though.

Who in their right mind would think that Black Swan was about psycho-ballerinas? OK, so maybe the concept of a highly-classified anti-terrorist team traveling the world under cover as a ballet company is a little far-fetched. That would make a great movie idea though…