If you have been following the Rodent Chronicles series, you’ll know that I have thus far been outsmarted by a garbage eating animal with a brain the size of a .177 pellet.

I think I have figured out the problem. All successful military campaigns include dudes with really snazzy looking uniforms. You have to look good to win right?

When Rome ruled the world, their tough guys wore nice skirts like this. Notice the subtle, yet powerful combination of fabric and iron:

Roman military uniform

Roman military uniform

And who can’t be impressed by the snazzy digs that the Swiss guards of the Vatican wear? If you’re protecting the Pope after all, you have to look higher and mightier than the average grunt. And nothing instills fear in your enemy like draping chiffon.

Swiss guard at the Vatican

Mega-intimidating Swiss Guard Uniform


My wife got me this. I think it will help bring victory.



Uniform de la Muerte