Panties???

Say Uncle made me laugh out loud. In the morning even :-)

Going out with a bang!

Launch Your Dead Relatives!

Launch Your Dead Relatives!

Holy Smoke!

Dead relatives filling up your house? Cremation Urns taking up precious counter space? No problem!

Just launch ‘em out of your rifle, pistol, or shotgun!

Holy Smoke LLC will create custom loaded pistol, rifle, or shotgun ammunition packed with a little something extra – ashes of your loved ones. For example, just send them about a pound of ashes and they can custom load a case (250) shotshells so you can take one last trip to the range with your departed friends or family. We’re guessing that your faithful hunting dog would fly as well. Pun intended.

I suppose this goes give new perspective to going out with a bang.

 

In honor of Rat Catcher Day…

Happy Rat Catcher Day!

Happy Rat Catcher Day!

Dang it. We missed National Rat Catcher Day. Again.

Although 2 days late, we’re still going to re-post our favorite rat catching stories in honor of the event.

The Happening

Escalation to War

The Importance of Proper Uniform

Sneaky Ninja Stuff

Trench Warfare

Is Waterboarding Rodents Moral?

Ready! Aim! Shake Your Groove Thing!

Marquis Nazi Belt Buckle Pistol - NRA National Firearms Museum

Marquis Nazi Belt Buckle Pistol - NRA National Firearms Museum

“A man may die, nations may rise and fall, but an idea lives on.” – John F. Kennedy

Fortunately for us, some ideas do not live on. For example, the Marquis Nazi Belt Buckle Pistol invented during World War I and (nearly) fielded ‘en masse’ during World War II.

German Troops Practicing Groovy Hip Aiming Techniques

German Troops Practicing Groovy Hip Aiming Techniques

The Marquis Belt Buckle pistol, also known informally as the Power Pelvis Gun, was conceived by Louis Marquis while interned in a POW camp during World War I. Frustrated by long chow and loo lines, Marquis was consumed by a desire to exert his authority over other POW’s without drawing the attention of guards…

Read the full article at AmmoLand.com and learn more about Germany’s groovy hip gyration programs, effeminate battlefield charges, secret salsa dancer recruitment programs, and more!

A Call For More Common Sense Gun Laws!

Do Not Read This Sign Under Penalty of Law

Common Sense Laws

We agree with The Brady Campaign and The Coalition To Stop Gun Violence on one thing. We need more common sense gun laws.

Here are a few good examples…

In Nevada, it’s apparently still legal, more or less, to hang someone for shooting your dog. As long as they shoot your dog on your property.

In Pennsylvania, if you’ve participated in a duel, you’re no longer eligible to become Governor. Personally, we think this one ought to be amended just a tad. If you’ve lost a duel, then you’re no longer eligible to become Governor.

In Texas, if you are going to commit a crime, you legally have to give 24 hours notice to the police. This one makes a lot of sense to us. As Clint Smith says, the only reason to use a pistol for self defense is to fight your way to a rifle. With advance notice of crimes, you can have your rifle ready to go. Very convenient, this law of theirs.

Also in Texas, it is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel. First and third story buffalo sniping is fine as far as we can tell.

In the Peoples Republik of Kalifornia, it’s a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale. This law requires further clarification as we’re not sure if beach whales are included or not.

If you’re a churchgoer in Maine, you’re required by law to bring your shotgun to church in case of attack by Native American Casino Owners. Five-card poker on Saturday night, church on Sunday morning.

While we’re generally in favor of as much liberty as possible when it comes to the Second Amendment, the common sense law in Chico, California probably ought to go national in scope. If you detonate a nuclear device within the city limits, you’ll be liable for a $500 fine.

In Kentucky, it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon more than six-feet long. We always make it a point to leave our German Pak 38 at home when driving through the horse-race state – even though we’ve got some really sweet CrossBreed IWB holsters for it.

In Kansas It’s illegal to throw knives at men wearing striped suits. We’re not sure if you can shoot them with Thompson’s though.

In Louisiana, biting someone with your natural teeth constitutes simple assault, but biting someone with your false teeth classifies as aggravated assault. Ok, so that’s not a gun law per se, but once you start biting people with false teeth, the very next step is gun violence.

Rabbits may not be shot from motorboats in the state of Kansas. We’re confused on this one as we haven’t had much success shooting anything from a motor boat. Generally guns work better for shooting things.

If someone is moose hunting in Alaska, it’s illegal to whisper in their ear. While we’re still verifying this, we think it is legal to yell Wango Tango at the top of your lungs.

And last but not least, we offer the climactic conclusion to this article.. In Connersville, Wisconsin, during sexual intercourse, it is against the law for a man to fire his gun whilst the woman is having an orgasm. This might give new meaning to the word bang.

As regulations change frequently, be sure to check local ordnances before engaging in any of these activities.

It’s National Sea Monkey Day!

sea_monkeys.jpg

Amazing Sea Monkeys

Today is the day we celebrate everyone’s favorite insta-pet; it’s National Sea Monkey Day!

I don’t know about you, but I’ve got a packed agenda:

7:00am Rise and shine!

7:15am Fix up a nice bowl of plankton for breakfast

8:00am Head to the attic to retrieve my old Green Hornet comic books. I need to find one of those “Amazing Sea Monkey’s” advertisements

10:15am Order 10 or 20 thousand Amazing Sea Monkeys

10:16am Hmmm.

 

French Army Knife

In some strange way, I kind of want one.

French Army Knife

Submitted by: zetabeta
Posted at: 2011-05-12 16:34:37
See full post and comment: http://9gag.com/gag/119866

 

Smugglers with medieval catapult nabbed at border

So THAT’S how all those machine guns are getting smuggled from Harry’s Tackle and Bait Shop into Mexico…

Smugglers with medieval catapult nabbed at border | Reuters:

 

Ice Grenade

I guess if its too warm it ‘detonates’ on the carrier :-)

Ice Grenade:

Don’t know the source or any other details on this one… but it sure does look good. With another day of temperatures in the low teens, I thought I’d continue with the ice theme.

Ice Grenade

(Via Weapon Blog.)

Long Lost Kahles Scope Used By Minnesota Iceman

Minnesota Iceman Kahles Scope - Scooby Doo

Minnesota Iceman - Owner of Lost Kahles Scope (Image: Hanna Barbera)

Kahles, Austrian manufacturer of fine rifle optics, recently unveiled the result of what was perhaps the longest field endurance test of hunting equipment ever – a Helia rifle scope lost in the Alps for what initially appeared to be nearly four decades. After showing the long lost rifle and scope at the 2011 SHOT Show, Kahles officials made an even more startling discovery about the scope’s origins.

“When we embarked on a carbon dating test, to settle a bar bet mind you, we discovered that the Kahles scope had been lost far longer than we originally thought” stated Kahles CEO Ben Cartwright. “Imagine our surprise when we found out that the rifle and scope were over 5,300 years old.”

Kahles Lost Helia Rifle Scope

Kahles Lost Helia Rifle Scope (Image: Kahles)

Further research on the scope’s origins yielded more surprising discoveries. Given the location of the find, compared with known hunting trails of the era, it was determined that the rifle and scope were likely owned by the Minnesota Iceman, discovered in 1968. “While most cavemen of that era hunted with rocks and spears, the really well-heeled ones could afford a nice bolt action” commented Cartwright.

Kahles engineers were thrilled with the scope’s perfect operational condition when it was originally believed the scope was in the wild for 30 years. “That in itself demonstrates an amazing feat of engineering” observed Kalhles Product Manager Carl Sagan. “When we found out it was really over 5,000 years old we weren’t really all that surprised. We build these things to last you know. However we were a little shocked that the Minnesota Iceman got his hands on a pre-production model. We hadn’t released those to the market 5,300 years ago. We’re guessing one of our interns borrowed it from the lab or something and got careless.”

After an exhaustive genealogical search, company officials were able to locate a descendant of the original owner in hopes of returning the scope to the family. On hearing the good news, modern day iceman Grrrug was ecstatic. “Mrmffphh urrgghhumpp grrrgxvz Kahles Scope arrgmph grrrrrq frumph” exclaimed the happy descendant of the rifle’s original owner.

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