Punxsutawney Phil's Last Known Sighting
Gobbler’s Knob, Punxsutawney, PA – Stunned officials from the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club announced the end of 122 years of American tradition today. In a somber press conference, Groundhog Club President Vladimir Putin announced that Groundhog Day has been permanently canceled as Punxsutawney Phil was plugged stone-cold dead by an overly enthusiastic snipe hunter.
“We’re just shocked” mumbled Putin. “Club members have been keeping Phil alive for well over 100 years with unicorn blood. That’s not easy to get you know. Especially with the hunting laws in Pennsylvania.”
Master Key Shotgun / Rifle (Photo: texasguntalk.com)
Early forensic reports that Punxsutawney Phil was finally done in by a new weapon called a Master Key. Produced on an episode of Discovery Channel’s new reality series Sons of Guns, the Master Key is a combination 12 gauge shotgun and AR-15 semi-automatic rifle. “Apparently the guy blew Phil’s hole wide open with a breaching load, then nailed him good with the AR” observed Pennsylvania forensic crime scene investigator David Caruso. “That can wreck any Groundhog Day for sure. The hunter claims he thought Phil was an angry emu and it was self defense.”
“Now what are we supposed to do?” asked Groundhog Club Social Director Bill Murray. “Start an Elk’s Club Chapter or something?”
Tom McHale was born a helpless, shooting-deprived infant. He later discovered the joys of collecting and shooting guns, reloading ammunition and writing about his adventures with a healthy dose of fun. Tom's career has been diverse, bordering on dysfunctional, with most of it spent leading marketing teams for a variety of technology companies including Microsoft and more than a couple of high-tech startups. He's finally seen the light and given up the corporate life to pursue his passion of creating slightly crazy, but educational, content related to guns, shooting, concealed carry and self defense. 
Nice comic relief.